And that, My Friend, Is a Dark Side

What does the moon, Anakin Skywalker, Bob Crane (the star of Hogan's Heroes who was deeply involved in the porn industry and was murdered because of it, in case you didn't know) , and Dr. Jekyll have in common? A dark side, my friend. In my favorite movie When Harry Met Sally the main character Harry talks about his dark side. He spends hours, days, thinking about death and the reads the last page of a book first so in case he dies he knows the end of the book.

I definately have a dark side. This dark sidemakes me want to terminate Ryan Seacrest, Katie Couric, and Trisha Yearwood with telekinetic powers. I am pretty dark. Oh if you only knew. Instead of the cute Disney version of Cinderella, I prefer the dark original Cinderella. Screw the stepsisters just curling up their toes to stuff their giant feet into a tiny shoe. Try them cutting off their toes and part of their heel stuffing it into the shoe, then leaving a blood trail as they walk off with Prince Charming (more like Prince Stupid), who doesn't even realize till the little bird tells him. Evil laugh: Mooowahahahahahahaha, I love it! My dark side kills innocent tadpoles. Yes, I'm sorry amphibian lovers since childhood I have had this desire to pick on little black slimy tadpoles.

Yay RANDOM STORY TIME!

So growing up we had thes giant pond and every year love stricken frogs would have choose our pond to get it on and raise their children. And my sister and I would "experiment" on the baby tadpoles. Just simple, harmless (we thought) experiments like will a tadpole survive falling down a three tier waterfall (strangely, yes) and how hard can you squish a tadpole before it well gets smashed. The survival rate was minimal but it was all in the NAME OF SCIENCE! Ok maybe not, well actually not, I just like to torture tadpoles. That my friend is a dark side.

Excellent specimens for experimentation

Moowahahahahaha!!!!!!
Sorry I just had to do that one more time

Someone Say My Name Right

So my name is Kateri (Ka-tear-ee) and from the dawning of time, August 29, 1989 (the day of my birth) the name Kateri was picked out for yours truly. Its beautiful I know, you don't need to tell me its my effin name. But it is hell being named Kateri. My name has been butchered as if it were a song sung by an American Idol contestant. Canary, Catorac, Kay-tree, Ka-tar-ee, Kat-err-eye are just a few of the ways my name has been butchered. Even my grandpa sometimes doesn't say it right.

Ok so I sound like a whiny brat. Oh poor little girl with the weird name that no one can say. But it honestly sucks introducing yourself and the response is always "HUH?" or "K what?" "Say that again" "How do you spell that?" Also try sitting in class as the professor calls out names to hand out tests. My last name begins with a B so I should get my test toward the first. BUT I NEVER DO! You know why? The teacher can never pronounce my first name and usually can't get the last name either. I listen for my name the professor yells out some name with a K. Is it me? No that's to far from Kateri to be me. Katie that has to be someone else. Damn it! He went through all the B names. So I have to wait till the end of class to get my test when I should have gotten it first.

However I'm a glass is half full girl. THANK YOU MOM that my name isn't Britney, Jessica, or Ashley. No offense to the millions of girls with those names but like I said there are millions of you. I bet you don't know very many girls named Kateri. Also, Kateri is from an almost catholic saint. She's one miracle away from the Big Time. Yeah look it up, its legit.

Isn't she all cute and holy looking :)

Now you are probably thinking Kateri is such a pretty name! I think I'm gonna name my little girl that name someday. BEEZY! don't even think about it. First, its lame to get your child's name off of a silly girl,s blog and second we can't have a whole bunch of Kateri's running around then it looses its Unique Powers.

YAY! RANDOM STORY TIME.

Ok so in high school there was another girl in an near by town with the name Kateri she pronounced it Ka-t-AIR-EE totally different than Ka-tear-ee but whatever. Anyways she died in a tragic drunk driving accident (sad, I KNOW) but everyone thought it was ME! So we had all kinds of people calling my house, school, and creepily people kept calling my phone. I mean who calls a dead person. Seriously. Its like "I have some sad news, Kateri died" "OH MY GOD, I better call her cell phone right NOW!" but as weird as it sounds people did, and of course I was alive so I answered. Talk about relief on the other line from the weirdos that call dead people. Point of the RANDOM STORY TIME, the name Kateri has Unique Powers.

So please say my name right because its awesome

KA-TEAR-EE